Saturday, April 01, 2006

The Waiting Game




We welcome you today to The Waiting Game, where you, yes you, will have a chance to sit and wait in the comfort of your own home as you count the minutes, nay hours, nay days, maybe even week— and for the bold of heart…months to find out the fate of yours truly. For our first round of waiting, we ask you to bite your nails and grab hold of the loved one sitting next to you as Puxameu waits in quite desperation (no breaking limbs or downcast faces) for the results of his MATC Portfolio review. Ladies and Gentlemen, if Puxameu receives a passing grade, he is practically guaranteed to advance to the next level. The level of Job Hunting. (Puxameu has already spent time applying to jobs locally and across the nation.) So he is off to a decent start, especially if he passes the Portfolio test. The Job Hunt wait is not for the faint of heart. You may be expected to wait for what may seem like eternities for the job to finally come to Puxameu. He will need every finger and toe crossed by everyone in our audience. Rub the Rosary, or belly of the chubby, fat bald statue dude if you’ve got them too. Never before in the history of this program have we presented you with this level of drama and suspense. Please, if you need assistance, reboot your computer, turn off the screen saver, and bookmark this page.

Like spinning the wheel of chance, hopefully fortune, Puxameu will become a household name with action figures to boot. We are accepting pre-orders now. Send cash or money orders immediately to Puxameu Inc.and we will think about sending you not just one, but two Puxameu action figures with built in pull string that says “Rock on Puxameu, Rock on Puxameu, give me a dollar. (sorry, no refunds available for any reason)

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Where is this puxameu? I want one!!! I'm sure he passed with flying colors...red, black, and white! You go boy!
Me

Lyle said...

Anonymous-You can't have a new Puxameu unless the old one breaks. After 11 years and still going...talk about warranty. No 3rd world sweatshop model for you of course, you have the original, who only appreciated in value after you took himn out of the box.

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

Fine...I see how you are. Well then, I'll take every action figure you have plus all the memorabilia that goes with it...Maybe we could negotiate a buyout? Keep waiting on that MATC portfolio result, we'll see what puxameu looks like after he gets it!
Me

compulsive writer said...

Best wishes--fingers are crossed in your behalf!!!

Pappy Yokum said...

Well, the check is in the mail, please send me my complete set of Puxameu action figures. In the meantime, I'll pour salt over my shoulder, avoid seeing any black cats, stay away from mirrors and ladders and wish on every star for you. I'll even venture to rub Mammy's cornpone pipe - now that's being bold!

Lyle said...

Pappy- as soon as the check arrives we will ship your order. Rubbing the Mrs. pipe...that's some mighty voo-doo indeed. Bless ya sir. Bless ya.

Compulsive- you wouldn't happen to have six fingers on your right hand....? Mr. Thumbkin I'm sure needs a crossing partner.