Puxa Meu

All Good Things

2009-07-08T17:14:00.000-07:00

I've known for some time.
Several months in fact.
I've been in denial.
My fate would be tied to the Jolly Porter.
It was the Jolly Porter that introduced me to the Blog.

My blog has served its purpose.
No Facebook.
No My Space.
If you want to know what's going on you're welcome to call, email or heaven forbid, write an actual letter.

Perhaps someday I'll return.
Not in a Micheal Jordon Fashion.
I think I passed my Blog peak long ago.
Not in a Terminator fashion.
I'm not a violent person.
Not in a General MacArthur fashion.
I'm not a General.

I may still sneak peaks at your blogs from time to time.

So thank you Jolly Porter
for the inspiration.
Thank you Jolly Porter
for helping make this easier.
Thank you... those who stopped by
with or without commenting.

and so, Boa Noite.

Reluctant Govenors and my relation to Napoleon Dynomite (...or at least Uncle Rico)

2009-05-21T18:54:00.000-07:00

As if very many of my readers care, I was left wondering what's going on inside the head of our good governor of Nebraska... and even my fellow Nebraskans who seem to have taken a left turn in the corn maze. I'm talking about the new license plate that was chosen/voted on for our 2011 design.

This was one of four final contestants [hand picked by the governor], two of which actually portrayed something that relates to Nebraska. So after putting it to a vote, we now get black and white with a subtle reminder to visit your local government online. Are most Nebraskans artfully challenged?

So now I am also finding myself feeling a little uncle Rico-ish.

No, I'm not dying to relive the glory days of high school football [I would actually have to have played high school football to have that happen] but I find myself extremely nostalgic for 80's music. I know life was a lot simpler then and listening to music was such a big part of my teenage years. I no longer have that luxury.

So, what are you nostalgic for?

In the Name of Art

2009-04-17T18:33:00.000-07:00

I actually remembered a post that I have wanted to do for a very long time.

There are many pieces of "art" that hang on the walls where I work. I would like to share with you, two "replicas" that I must endure on a regular basis. While indeed, they are not true replicas, they will still serve to make my point.

and now for the second one...

The top one actually consists of a "comical" looking bouquet of flowers that sits centered on a blue, red, and yellow square about 3" in diameter, which sits on a larger white, cotton canvas about 18" x 24", with a 2" mat for the frame.

What can I say about the second? Really, it's made of a bunch of random lines of different colors on a solid background.

Many of us have heard the expression, "My 5 year old could paint that". I believe the statement to be true.

How do you call something art that is so easily replicated, particularly by someone who is not an artist?

Anyone care to jump to the defense of art? Anyone? Can anyone tell me? Buhler?

Of course, after this post, I'll probably find myself back to where I was prior to this post.

Slow

2009-04-14T18:44:00.000-07:00

I suffer from two blogging problems:

1. I can't think of anything to write.

or

2. I think of things to write about when I am at work, driving to and fro, or doing anything else, and then I forget what it was I wanted to write about.

So until I find a cure for one or the other, or both, this is all you get for now.

Giving Rhetoric a Bad Name

2009-03-25T19:51:00.000-07:00

Recently I've heard a commercial on the radio for Tylenol. They would have you and me believe that [dare I say the word?] acetaminophen might as well be lead based sugar pills from China.

Only Tylenol has gone through the most stringent testing and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Could it be that because Tylenol was the first one forced to go through all the FDA hoops and once their patent expired, anyone and everyone else could make their own pill full of acetaminophen and sell it for a cheaper price [less money to recoup]?

We should all buy Tylenol because more doctors/hospitals give it to their patients than any other generic form?

I'm sure it has nothing to do with the money the doctors/hospitals get in return for giving the name brand. If the doctor were to write you a prescription, would s/he insist that the pharmacist only give you the name brand? I think not.

It reminds me of a certain banker who once preached to me the evils of credit unions.

My philosophy is that if a little competition scares you, then step aside.

More Yes than No

2009-03-19T17:21:00.000-07:00

Yes, I'm still alive.

Yes. I'm still employed.

Yes. I'm still married [just celebrated 14 years with the same wonderful woman].

Yes, I still have hair on my head.

Yes, I still go to church.

Yes, I drive a mini-van.

Yes, I read the girly Twilight series and liked them.

Yes, I still blog [when I can].

Yes, this list might grow as the mood hits me.

No. Our issue with Vonage still has not been resolved...

If I wanted to play games I'd ask a friend...

2009-02-19T16:34:00.000-08:00

As promised, this is the continuation of the last post. 10 days later and the game Vonage set in motion continues.

I signed up for Vonage January 1, 2009. I was told that it would take 10-14 days to change over our existing phone number. 14 days passed and our old phone number still had not been changed over. I called Vonage. I was told they needed my old phone number account and then they would resubmit the request to have our number changed over. I was told this would take 2-3 days. 3 days later, I called again to ask why our phone number still had not changed over. I was told they didn't know why. They said they would re-resubmit the request [and it should only take 2-3 days]. This pattern continued into the first week of February.

I finally tried calling our old carrier to find out what the problem was. They told me, that according to their records, they had agreed from day 1 with Vonage to release our phone number on February 10th. From day 1!

The day our old phone number finally switched over, I called Vonage and explained that I did not want their service any longer. They explained that they would have to charge me for three things: The equipment, early cancellation fee and the entire month of February. I asked them how they could justify for charging me for anything at all when they did not live up to their end of the bargain and the fact their customer service reps were never upfront with me about when the changeover date would take place. The cancellation folks at Vonage told me it was out of their hands. If I wanted to, I could submit a request in writing, to their billing department and spell out my reasons for requesting a refund.

I wrote my letter.

I received a response saying that they were going to expedite my case.

They informed me that they would refund me the price of the equipment if I sent it back to them.

I said fine. What about the rest of the fees?

They wrote back. They said they would refund the early cancellation fee.

I said fine. What about the charges for February?

They still have not responded.

You can call a skunk by any other name and it will still stink like a skunk.

When Vonage canceled our account, they shut us down right then and there. Somehow a third party ended up with rights to our phone service. We have not been able to receive any calls. We can only make local calls. When we called our old carrier to "re-sign" up they told us that they could not give us our old number yet, because Vonage still had it listed as connected. They informed us that the third party that currently controls our temporary number is charging us 10 cents per minute for local calls...what more would you like me to say?

Hanging in the Balance

2009-02-09T18:15:00.001-08:00

Sorry folks [all three of my readers], this new post takes precedence over the last post.
Without saying too much at this point, I will say that a Vonage has the ball in their court and pending their return serve will depend on what gets posted next...

Feel free to continue posting comments on the previous entry and I will continue responding accordingly. If you are dying to know more about this new post, you are welcome to contact me offline.

What a Workout!

2009-02-02T18:36:00.000-08:00

Last night I had quite the workout; I helped a new family move into a 3rd floor apartment, in a snow storm. I mastered those stairs! Did I mention the fact that it was three flights of stairs... for nearly 90 minutes?

So tell me, if you lived to tell the tale, what was your hardest move-in/move-out?

An Accounting: Traveling to Utah and Back

2008-12-30T17:29:00.000-08:00

We recently returned from a fun filled trip to see both sets of parents, cause anything less, would be uncivilized. There are many things to see and behold on a drive that takes you through Nebraska, Colorado, Utah, and Wyoming.

12. Car wrecks,
11. Tons of road salt [scattered over 1,800 miles],
10. Colorado State Troopers,
9. Cabooseless locomotives,
8. Skiers falling,
7. Frozen waterfalls,
6. Mountain tunnels,
5. Million shoppers
4. Children sledding,
3. Family parties
2. Mormon temples,

...and a Shooting star over Grand Island.

Gripe

2008-12-07T19:26:00.000-08:00

Where is the Logic?

I'm sure there are many other fans of other teams that have similar gripes?

NFL- Playoffs
NBA- Playoffs
MLB - Playoffs
NHL - Playoffs
College Basketball - Playoffs
College Baseball - Playoffs
I could continue the list.

So why does College Football have to rely on such a pathetic rule system the IRS would be envious of?

Why I am not a Plumber

2008-11-26T17:46:00.000-08:00

I've never seen a plumber smile while they are working [seeing them smile when they walk away with your check is not the same].

It's disgusting.

It's physically a pain.

It's mentally a pain.

It's emotionally a pain.

They are the butt of too many jokes.

No one wants to hug you when the job is done [unless you've had a chance to clean yourself up first].

Did I mention pain?

Care to add any of your own?

Some Boys Never Learn

2008-11-01T11:03:00.000-07:00

You would think that after more than 35 years of being a boy, I would learn a thing or two about what to do and what not to do.

Today I discovered that our cat had spent just a little too much time in our garage and was not able to get to her litter box in time. So what did she end up using... my open cordless drill carrying case. To make matters worse, I did not discover this until probably two weeks after the fact.

Fortunately, my cordless drill was not in the case... however, all my little attachments were. So in the spirit of boyness, I grabbed some lighter fluid [can you see where this is going?], dumped the contents onto the garage floor, struck a match, and viola! The first few seconds was kinda cool. Who doesn't love a good flammable liquid enhanced fire? Then the mold growing cat pee started to burn off.

That's when the stink came.

That's when reason should have set in.

That's when reason took a leave of absence and I poured more lighter fluid on.

That's when the stink got stinkier.

After all my years of scouting and putting out camp fires the manly way. I should have known what I was getting myself into.

But some boys never learn.

Reflections

2008-10-16T20:53:00.000-07:00

And this
is true.

The Executiuve Jet Set

2008-10-02T21:34:00.000-07:00

Yes. It's true. I just got back from flying in one of these things. I highly recommend it. Our company owns two of them and I took a day jaunt on up to visit our sister company in Sioux Falls. Word to Sioux Falls: you have a lovely town. Thanks for the good time.

We left Nebraska around 7:30 in the morning, worked a full day in Sioux Falls and made it back home by 6:00. I could get used to this kind of business travel...now if only I could talk the pilot into doing a barrel roll next time we go.

Coupons For Depends

2008-08-30T08:52:00.000-07:00

I must admit that I was quite surprised by what came in the mail the other day. I know I'm getting old. I can feel it in my bones. I'm not as nimble as I once was. Naps are something I dream about being able to take. I've lost one permanent tooth. I wear glasses. I don't have any tattoos or body piercings. I don't own an iPod or any type of mP3 player. I don't even text message.

But come on. I'm not ready for this...

Musings

2008-07-23T10:32:00.001-07:00

Feel free to add your thoughts:

1. There have been many times I wish I had time to just sit and watch the the prairie grass blow in the wind. I think prairie grass is God's way of compensating those that do not live along the coast.

2. White noise- my favorite white noise comes from the old school style of cool mist vaporizers/humidifiers that were big and round and it only took seconds for beads of moisture to condensate on your face. Turn one of those on and soothe the savage beast.

3. After living a less than luxurious lifestyle for so many years (and now living where it's legalized) I am beginning to understand the lure of lotteries. Who wouldn't like to win a multi-million dollar jackpot just to get beyond the poverty level. Statistically, how many people that earn more than 100,000 ever purchase lottery tickets?

Old News and New News

2008-07-01T10:21:00.001-07:00

Old News:
I've been meaning to ask the following question(s) for some time but have not had time to post my question(s).

A few weeks ago, Tiger Woods made a public apology for some negative comments he had made about hockey.

Why has our world reduced itself to such a pitiful state of insecurity?
Why are we so quick to take offense, just because someone does not agree with us?
Honestly, do you think it was necessary for Tiger Woods to issue his apology? If your answer is in the affirmative, I really want to hear your pathetic reasons why [and there will be no apology from me for calling your reasons "pathetic"].

Bonus feature:
I'm tired of car commercials that try to brag about getting 20 mpg.
20 mpg is nothing to brag about. I had a Yugo back in the 80's that got 45 mpg [without being a hybrid.] Granted it was a small engine, but still...

New News:
We just survived a quick trip to Utah and Colorado. Word to the wise, don't forget your toiletry bag at the hotel. Such action makes for quite the inconvenience for the rest of the trip.

Don't travel on I-70 through Colorado and expect to cover the same distance in the same amount of time as if you were traveling on I-80 or I-40.
Why are all the pine trees on the eastern end of the Rockies dying?

To those we missed seeing during our brief stay, we wish there had been more time. It wasn't anything personal. So don't take offense.

Good neighbor rule:
Neighbor 1 likes to feed the free range bunnies in our neighborhood.
I'd rather build an owl box and let nature take its course.

What would you do in this situation if your garden was on the line? [and I don't want to hear about wire fencing either.]

At Long Last

2008-05-24T12:06:00.000-07:00

I must have been about 8 years old when I first laid my hands upon a Rubik's Cube. It took a long time, but I remember finally learning how to solve one side...and then I figured out how to solve two sides...[anyone who has solved the entire puzzle knows that that is nothing to brag about, because it does not put you any closer to solving all six].

Now, about a zillion years later, my 9 year old ended up with a cube of his own. Thanks to a good teacher [yes I snatched it out of his hands] and learning about algorithms, I can now enter into the elite solver's club. Now I just can't decide on which color of jacket to buy.

It 's New To Me

2008-05-04T15:34:00.000-07:00

One of the things that I am loving about living here in Nebraska is the birds. Having been raised most of my life in [suburban] Utah, I was pretty much limited to seeing seagulls, starlings, and three robins.

Brazil had parrots and urabu [vultures].

Texas had great tailed grackles and mourning doves.

But Nebraska has robins aplenty, common grackles, mourning doves, blue jays, cardinals, red-wing black birds, wood peckers, sparrows, seagulls hawks, vultures, owls...and until we learn to hate them, squirrels.

Granted, those that have grown up with such birds may not share my enthusiasm and that's okay. If you grew up around these birds and still haven't tired of them, then that's great too.

Office Currency

2008-04-29T17:29:00.000-07:00

What a sad state of affairs it can be when your place of work uses paper clips as a form of currency [for favors/services rendered].

...Fortunately we have not reached that point of desperation, yet.

Patent

2008-04-08T20:02:00.000-07:00

I have officially decided to remove the patent on being me...or at least allow for certain provisions. Now anyone, anywhere, anyplace...for a small nominal fee can apply to be me.

All parties interested must complete three short essay questions and submit them with a cashiers check made out to me for $99.99. All entries will be carefully screened, considered, and evaluated by me, myself and I. Only those that I/we deem worthy of such an honor will be issued a license to be me. Free and clear.

Please answer the following questions in 100-250 words [each]:

1. Why do you want to be me?

2. What do you hope to accomplish by being me?

3. Why does the sun rise?

Sticks and Stones

2008-03-18T19:02:00.000-07:00

Our Chillins can be so darned cute.

We recently celebrated an other anniversary, and in light of their limited resources, our kids put their hearts and mind together to give us each a special rock [almost heart shaped] and sticks with our pictures drawn on them.

Warren Buffett can keep his billions, cause non of that will produce a gift like we got.

Kansas,

2008-03-03T07:48:00.000-08:00

Really Kansas, I don't know what your beef with me is all about. You have been a most inhospitable host twice now: the first time was during my first drive to Nebraska and the second time was last night coming back to Nebraska in a moving van. The first time you poured incessantly on me and led me blindly through every skunk trail nestled in your hills. And now this second time, you came back at me with a vengeance: the cascading rain, the gusting wind, and the blizzardy snow.

Don't pretend to act as though I didn't know that just the day before you were a gracious sunny 70 degrees for everyone else. What did I ever do to you to deserve your contempt? Acting so childishly, you should be sent to time out [note to Mr. G. W. Bush, Kansas needs a whooping, send out the National Guard].

Is it my fault the company I work for is located in Nebraksa? If you are going to hold a grudge with anyone, it ought to be with Nebraska. But really, to do so wold be childish. After all, you still have Dorthy.

The End Is Near

2008-02-26T18:16:00.000-08:00

My Bacheloring days in the lonely garden of Nebraska are numbered!!!!